Women Who Inspire: Happy birthday week Mama!

A month ago, one of my favorite bloggers, A Cup of Jo, wrote a short post talking about the women who inspire her and asking her readers to consider the women who have impacted them.  I learned about some pretty spectacular women when I read through the comments on the original blog post, so I would encourage you to check it out.

My first ever strong, female role model was my mother. She is strong, tough, hard working, smart and immeasurably selfless. And her birthday is on Friday!

She left her career as a chemist to stay home with me and my siblings and then home-schooled us because it is what she and my dad felt led to do. On top of raising and teaching three kids, she also taught other people's children in our home for several years. She selflessly served others by being the caretaker of my great, great aunt and later my grandma. She also made time for morning walks through the woods, gardening, raising chickens and glorifying Jesus. She didn't miss opportunities to have fun with us growing up because she knew the dishes in the sink weren't going anywhere. In her post home-schooling years she has kicked cancer's butt, constantly seen to the physical and emotional health of elderly people in her life, become a substitute teacher, started graduate school school, navigated a major life crisis where her husband almost died and started a new career. My mama has always been an example of how our personal struggles and circumstances do not excuse us from the call to serve others in the name of Jesus.

She has taught me that makeup and clothes do not make the woman, one good denim jumper and a cotton plaid dress can last you YEARS. She can rock a cool straw hat with a pair of hiking boots and jeans like no other. She imparted on me my love of science. She showed me that whether it is a scientist or a stay at home mom, women can have any kind of career they choose. 

So yeah, she's cool and she has a story that deserves to be celebrated. Our role models don't necessarily have to change the whole world; sometimes impacting the world of the people around you is enough. That's what we should all be striving to do.

A little something for my dad

In May, my father had a major heart attack and we were seconds from not being able to celebrate Fathers Day this year. I had called that morning to tell him about my physics final and how I thought I didn't do well. When my uncle answered the phone instead I knew something had gone horribly wrong. In those few seconds, the fear of failing physics melted away and was replaced with an overwhelming emptiness. I didn't think I could live in a world where I couldn't call my dad every day to talk about world events, politics, finances and home repairs. God blessed us so much and he is still here with us, and for that, I am eternally grateful.

Photo: Elle Golden Photography

So, Daddy, since you are in Georgia and I won't get to see you or share a slice of Mama's lemon meringue pie today, I would like to list a few lessons that I've learned from you by your actions and words. I'm so glad you're still around to teach me some more.

• Nothing is scarier than the Steve Berry Scowl, even when you're just joking.
• If there is going to be a fight, throw the first punch. If you decide that there isn't going to be a fight, walk away.
• Don't ever let anyone hurt your little sister.
• Serve others without pretense or prejudice and never have an expectation of recognition or thanks. 
• Family is more important than wealth, a prestigious career, or a favorite hobby. 
• Always wear clean underwear in case you have to go to the hospital. 
• If you own a truck, everyone will want to borrow it.
• Sometimes you eat a meal so good that it deserves a second blessing afterwards. 
• Everyone should know how to change their own tire.
• Baseball is still America's greatest sport.
• Make sacrifices for your spouse because they're worth it.
• The best bags of Doritos have spice balls in them. 
• Your friendships with your siblings are some of the most important relationships you'll ever have.
• Never stay in debt longer than you need to. 
• Having good insoles in your work boots will make your day better. Changing your socks when your feet get hot will change your attitude.
• Always give elderly people hugs and let them tell stories about when they were your age. Many times we forget that they need to be shown affection and attention like anyone else.
• Change your oil every 3,000 miles. No exceptions.
• Always, always, always hug your mama and tell her you love her.
• If you are going to do something, do it well.
• Give your life to Jesus and follow his teachings.

Happy Fathers Day Padre! I love you!

Best laid plans and homemade dog soap

Yesterday, Jamie and I decided to take Ellie to Memorial Park in Houston. It is a beautiful oasis of forest inside the city and one of the only natural riparian zones in the city that I've seen so far. According to the park website, the entire park is home to three different ecosystems: forest, meadow and wetlands. There is a collection of bike trails that we thought would be perfect to explore with her because it reminds me of my parent's house where Ellie has lived the last 3 years. There are 5 separate mountain biking trails that all link together but we didn't really glance at the map at the trail head. Jamie and I had been there for a short walk before with no issues. Well, surprise, we got super lost. What was supposed to be a thirty minute little meander through the woods ended up being almost two hours, and the first half of the walk on intense mountain bike courses covered in slick clay from all the rain. In Houston heat, with a slightly out-of-shape dog, that's a fairly big deal. Luckily, we had Nalgene of water and Ellie loves drinking out of dirty puddles.
Another reason we wanted to take her here was because she just had a bath after the dog park the day before so we didn't want to have to bathe her again from jumping in a pond or anything. The joke was on us about that. Luckily, I have a great homemade dog soap recipe that can double as soap to clean out the bathtub after we wash her. Check it out at the bottom of this post!

 When we started our excursion, Ellie was leading the charge! There were so many smells and plants that she was ready to explore, it was a little difficult keeping her focused on walking.

 Before we really realized we were lost, I stopped to take a picture of this plant with really interesting blooms. And then a monarch butterfly landed which is so cool because it's the first pretty butterfly I've seen since I've lived here. I haven't been able to identify the plant. There is nothing like it in my southeastern wetland or forest field guides. Has anyone ever seen it?

 This part of the trail was completely a puddle so we were trying to get Ellie to just walk through it. At this point we were 45 minutes in to our unexpectedly long walk. She was tired and hot so she laid down and had a drink of mud water.

 Ellie really didn't want to leave that puddle.

This one has me a little stumped. I'm pretty certain it's an Asteraceae but narrowing it down any further is a little difficult without the proper regional field guide.

Lantana

I couldn't determine the species without a field book which I unfortunately didn't bring along

Vitis rotundifolia or muscadine

This reminds me of Centrosema or butterfly pea but it isn't. Can anyone point me in direction of the genus? I am pretty positive it's in the Fabaceae family.

 Passiflora incarnata or the maypop

 We were really lucky that most of the trails are shady and somewhat cool. But the humidity was unbelievable and I don't think Jamie or I have ever had so many mosquito bites. We were both wearing tons of bug spray too!

 Here's Ellie's second puddle break.

 And then, at last, after doubling back at a part of the trail we had seen before and following it out, we found civilization and other people! Woot!

 Ellie's third and final puddle break of the day, in the parking lot with the truck in sight.

 The people who were also hosing their dog off happened to be marathon runners so of course Jamie had a nice long chat about the local marathon options!

When we got home we bathed Ellie, cleaned the tub, ate some lunch and then we all took naps! 

Homemade Lavender Dog Soap

         Ingredients

2 cups warm water

1/2 cup white vinegar

1/4 cup lavender dish soap

         Directions

Mix together and put in spray bottle.

Wash dog with soap.

Rinse dog.

Scrub out tub with soap.

Rinse tub.

Boom. Easy peasy, she smelled great and fleas don't like the smell of lavender. 

How to fool yourself into thinking you'll have a Pinterest worthy wedding.

(And then not even care how it turns out because you're way excited about getting married to the love of your life and nothing else really matters...)

The hippy dippy flower crown

 

I've been wearing braids and flowers in my hair since I watched Heidi in kindergarten. It only made sense for me to wear both of these on my wedding day. However, I had never actually made a flower hairpiece and waited until less two hours before the wedding to finish making it by loosely basing it on this tutorial. So picture this: here I am sitting on the floor of the farm house with a hot glue gun and iced coffee trying to hot glue rose and wax flower stems wrapped in flower tape onto a piece of wire with two metal hair combs attached to the edges. My hands were shaking because I was excited/nervous and I kept burning myself but gosh-darn-it I got that dern crown made and then it took Alex, Kylie and Cassy and like a million bobby pins to get it anchored in my hair and it was fabulous.

The cliché fake fireplace alter...

So, I also spent a lot of time on details that didn't end up being used like these fun glittery hearts that were supposed to hang from the tree we were going to stand under as we said our vows kind of like this picture from Pinterest. 

Originally, (as in all the way up to two days before the wedding,) Jamie and I were supposed to get married in a pecan orchard in front of the farm house at Morgan View Farm. We were going to stand under this limb in front of a big cross with sparkly hearts hanging from the tree behind it. Cassy, my mom and I came close to screaming while constantly trying to untangle fishing line. It was miserable, but it would have looked so cool.

 After I finally came to my senses about the impending weather and made the call to move everything to the covered arena, we realized that there was no backup plan for an alter. I remembered seeing a white fireplace frame at the location so I asked if we could use it. In my head, it was going to have tons of candles everywhere and look super romantic like this picture from my Pinterest dreams. On Friday night we called Alex's mom and asked her to buy every white pillar candle in Lee County. But alas, somehow it got lost in translation between the venue owners and us that the covered arena is a wind tunnel and not a single candle would stay lit. So we ended up with some simple lanterns on top of the fire place and it was fine because I was looking at Jamie the whole time anyway and I don't even care.

Ah, the famed flower toss exit

My Aunt Lori was gracious enough to host me and the bridesmaids at her house on Friday night and that's when we made the paper cones for the flower petals. (There was also red wine, cupcakes and Princess Bride... so basically it was a lot of fun.) The flower petals were something I intended to do the whole time but just pushed it off until the last second. We used lace paper doilies, rolled them into a cone and taped those bad boys up and tied a ribbon in them. There were so many last minute trips to Hobby Lobby and Michael's during this wedding week it's not even funny. It turned out to be one of my favorite details from the ceremony and I'm glad we did it. Also, my Uncle Michael made the petals magically appear in there. I am so glad he handled everything because at that point I was pretty much brain dead and didn't care anymore.

The eclectic vintage bud vase centerpieces

The centerpieces, favors and other details turned out pretty cool. Because of rain, our ceremony and reception location got changed at the last minute but everything for the reception transitioned pretty well! I got to use some of my Nama's old milk glass vases with my other bud vases for the centerpieces which was special way to incorporate her memory into the wedding. Cassy and I spent a few weekends painting cheap glass vases with details to make them a little more special looking. (You can see how they started taking over my house at one point here.) The large glass votives were not originally part of the plan but when my Unlce Michael saw that the centerpieces were way too small/short for the new reception location he incorporated them. There were supposed to be lots of tea lights sprinkled in with the bud vases but those couldn't stay lit in the wind either.

The Mr & Mrs seat signs

I spray painted these with glitter spray paint a few whole days before the wedding. Based on the rest of this post that should actually shock you a little.

The inevitable handmade signs and hashtag

 

I got those canvases 50% at Hobby Lobby the week before the wedding and did the "calligraphy" for them Thursday afternoon. I'm not really going to comment on the hashtag, it turned out to be pretty useful in tracking down pictures that other people snapped from the wedding later but good Lord is it cheesy.

The homemade favors (and some more handmade signs)

 

 I really do rock at procrastination procrastinate a lot. I'm starting to realize that all of these projects save the vases were done last minute. Alex and I stayed up late on Thursday night doing the calligraphy for the jam labels as well as making the ceremony programs (not pictured)...My mom grew the black berries and muscadines for the jams that she made from scratch and she grew the wildflowers that she harvested for seeds for the seed packets. She did all of this by herself and without being asked. A side note, my mom also made the boutonnieres and corsages so she was a pretty big help.

Fun fact: You know how favors rarely get taken home? Well my dad was not gonna let that happen and he went around handing out the jams and they went like hotcakes. People weren't quite as enthused about the wild flower seeds. Oh well... I'm going to be planting wild flowers from our wedding on our anniversary for years!

The cocktail hour that didn't really happen

Did y'all see that part on that really cute handmade schedule sign where there was supposed to be drinks and games? Well we hired "bartenders" through the venue who were supposed to serve boiled peanuts and coke during said cocktail hour. That didn't really happen (read: we kinda got a little screwed over/scheduling went wrong.) Before the rain changed everything there were also going to be yard games like bocce ball but the only thing that got salvaged from that in the new location was corn hole. So sorry about that guys! But I was having a good time after the ceremony taking pictures with my love, having a beer and eating fried chicken with him off in a quiet spot. 

I know it sounds like I'm complaining but what I'm trying to say is none of these details really mattered in the end. Jamie and I were so happy to just be actually having a wedding. It's so easy to get wrapped up in silly things about an event that don't matter. I got so stressed over all this stuff and worrying about other people's opinions that I didn't just enjoy the moment. I spent so much time on wedding blogs and reading Pinterest posts entitled "10 things former brides want you to know about weddings" and all I did was give myself this expectation that if I did those things I would have a "perfect" wedding. And we did have a perfect wedding, just not in the way I was expecting.

If you're planning on having a wedding in the future, try not procrastinate and don't think you can do it all yourself! 

Part Two: The Real Story and Favorite Moments from Our Wedding

My favorite part of the day:

 The Ceremony and Reception

 

I kind of underestimated how special walking down the aisle with my dad would be. In the picture on the left I'm wiping my nose on his suit because I got a little weepy and didn't have a tissue... oops.

I never stopped looking at Jamie the whole way to the alter. I honest to goodness didn't notice any of the decorations or people until after the whole shebang was over. 

Here's more ugly weepy/crying/laughing as Jamie reads me his vows.

The pastor, Wesley, is also a good friend of ours so it was really cool to have someone that's known you forever do the ceremony. Everybody says that his message was the best wedding they'd ever heard, but I honestly don't remember a word he said! Good thing we have a wedding video!

My bridesmaids were so pretty in all these pictures. They actually look way better than me because they aren't ugly crying.

I think this is the point during my vows where I word vomited. It was something like "Whew, I don't know if I'm going to get through the rest of these."

After we exchanged rings, Wesley prayed for us and it was really sweet.

The kiss. It took us a minute to stop kissing. I forgot everybody else was there.

 

I think this is the point where the tears became uncontrollable. 

Alex had to do touch ups because the powder I was wearing got blotchy with the tear trails. (My face felt stuck in a smile, in a good way.)

We got some really fun pictures with our friends. That tipping backwards thing is not easy, I am so unbalanced/heavy/fall often. Good thing Jamie is so strong.

There was mud everywhere. I was also proud that I shaved my legs so this was a good time to show them off.

Coordinating this picture almost caused me to want to disown my family members. I don't feel that way now obviously but everyone's emotions were running high at the time.

We finally got to go off on our own to that field where we were originally supposed to get married. Getting away from everybody was a huge relief because I'm an introvert and it was the first time I'd really had time to just hang out with Jamie since he got off the plane Thursday night. I was still weepy so I look ridiculous in some of those pictures. 

Jamie insisted on taking a picture while holding me. I was very skeptical at first because I could see us losing our balance and me going back to the reception with a huge grass stain on my butt. It all worked out though.

LeiLani from Elle Golden Photography took the pictures for our engagement shoot so she already knew that we were way more comfortable not actually posing for formal pictures. These turned out so great and I love them all.

I love this.

After taking pictures together, we went back to the "Man Cave" and Alex brought us the plates of fried chicken, collards and squash casserole and we chowed down while our guests ate as well. You may not have picked up on this yet but I recharge through quiet or alone time and I really needed that private dinner to help me get through the rest of the night. I was so excited that people we love were celebrating our marriage with us but I needed to recharge so I could drum up some more energy to enjoy the time at the reception with them. 

 

Our first dance was to "You and Me" by Dave Matthews Band which is one of our favorite songs. Jamie insisted on doing a choreographed dance and I don't dance. Did I mention he flew from Texas on Thursday night? That means we sort of practiced for 10 minutes after the Rehearsal Dinner. The top right picture is me yelling at him that I can't do the twirl thing he wants me to do and turns out I was right. So at some point when the song didn't cut off when we intended and we decided to just do our thing. I sang at the top of my lungs and Jamie air guitared. It was legit and so fun.

And then there were the other dances. They were special and sweet. (I'm not wiping my nose on my dad's shoulder there.)

A big shoutout to Chris Bonanno. His mixes kept us dancing and laughing all night. You are a gem.

At some point there were speeches and Alex definitely made me cry. I think Jamie might have gotten a little misty eyed.

 

 

 

 

And then we got to the really fun part where we got to dance to a bunch of cheesy wedding songs and it was the best.

The last dance of the night.

Around 9, Jamie and I decided we were ready to leave and go on our honeymoon so I went ahead and threw the bouquet. Kiana caught it and then tried to hand it off to Charis, but Charis handed it right back. It was pretty hilarious. 

I was psyched about our wedding cake. It was really yummy! We had two other kinds of cake as well, chocolate stout and coconut cake but I never saw them or got to taste any! Katie Wurstner of Macon Cakes is a wonderful and highly encourage you to hire her for any of your cake needs.

We said that we wouldn't shove cake in each other’s faces but in the moment I realized this was the one moment I had in my whole life where it was socially acceptable to shove cake in Jamie’s face so I went for it. It was fun!

The one thing that went completely according to plan from the get-go was our grand exit with sparklers and all. It was legit.

And that’s the real story on our wedding folks! Thanks for reading!